Including a family member in your wound care.

Why a second person helps

A wound visit packs a lot into a short time: measurements, a dressing plan, supply details and the date of the next visit. Including a family member in your wound care gives you a second set of ears and a second memory. It also gives the care team someone to reach when you are hard to get by phone.

The help is yours to shape. Some people want a daughter in the room for every visit. Others want a neighbor who only keeps the calendar. Both are fine.

Choose the person and the job

Pick someone you trust who is dependable and calm, not just whoever lives closest. “Family member” here means anyone you choose: a spouse, an adult child, a friend, a neighbor or a paid caregiver.

Then decide what you want that person to do. Common jobs include:

• Listener. Sits in on the visit and helps you remember what was said.
• Note taker. Writes instructions, dates and names in your wound care visit notebook.
• Question asker. Raises the items on your list if you forget or get tired.
• Scheduler. Takes calls about visit times, rides and supply deliveries.
• Hands-on helper. Helps with dressing changes or positioning between visits, once the treating clinician has shown them what to do.
• Second pair of eyes. Notices changes in places you cannot see, such as your back or heel.

If several relatives are pitching in, the guide to sharing wound care responsibilities with family can help you divide the work.

Talk it through before the visit

A short talk ahead of time prevents awkward moments in front of the clinician. Cover three things:

1. What you want them to do, and what you want to do yourself.
2. Topics you would rather they stay out of, or not hear at all.
3. A signal you can use when you want them to step in, or step out.

Say it plainly: “I want to answer the questions about my pain myself. Jump in if I forget the dates.”

Tell the care team who is involved

When you call Gateway at 314-325-0126 or send a request for care, mention anyone you want included. Give the person’s name, relationship and phone number, and say what calls they should get. We keep that with your request so scheduling calls reach the right person.

Health privacy rules generally let clinicians talk with a relative or friend involved in your care when you agree to it. Saying so out loud during a visit is often enough for that conversation. Ongoing phone updates, copies of records or decisions made on your behalf usually call for a signed form, and each practice or facility has its own. The guide on who can receive wound care updates explains how a contact person, a signed release and a health care power of attorney differ.

When your support person cannot be there

A son who works days or a sister helping from far away can still take part. Ask the treating clinician whether they can join by speakerphone or video while the plan is explained. If not, there are other ways to keep them informed:

• Have them send you their questions ahead of time so you can ask them yourself.
• Ask the clinician for written instructions you can photograph and share.
• Ask which office number your support person may call afterward, and whether a release is needed first.

Keep your voice at the center

Tell the clinician at the start how you want the conversation to run. For example: “Please talk to me first. My son is here to take notes.” If people begin talking about you instead of with you, say so.

You can ask your support person to step out for the exam, or for any part of the discussion, without giving a reason. The guide to privacy and comfort during wound care has wording you can borrow.

Your choices are not permanent. Tell the treating clinician’s office and Gateway when you want someone added, removed or given a smaller role. If you signed a release, ask how to update or cancel it in writing. A change applies from that point forward and cannot take back what was already shared. If a relative’s involvement ever makes you uneasy, you can tell the clinician so in private.

Common questions

Related pages

• Who can receive wound care updates
• Sharing care responsibilities
• Privacy and comfort
• Wound care visit notebook
• For families & caregivers
• Request care
• Insurance and cost questions
• Transportation for wound care